This Father’s Day, I have a request for the ladies out there:
Leave the term “Daddy” for the man who actually fathered and/or raised you. Please stop using it in reference to your significant other. It’s just weird! Lots of couples have pet names; pookie, sweetie, love monkey or whatever. That’s all fine and dandy, but for some reason I just can’t wrap my head around the idea of calling my husband “Daddy”.
Now, I understand the parents out there who do this for their children. As my friend Katie explains, “My husband and I are ‘mommy’ and ‘daddy,’ but that's because we have an 8 year old in the house. It's also only if we're asking each other something for our daughter. For instance, ‘Daddy, Kaylee wants to go to Outback for dinner.’ It's my way of sweet talking him because I want to go, too.”
That makes sense. But, what happens when “Daddy” is uttered in the bedroom? If you think about it, we really live in a culture filled with the sexy “Mommy & Daddy” relationship. George Michael wants to be your father figure. Usher wants you to know Daddy's home and even has backup singers greeting him with a sexy, “Hey, Daddy”. Movies like Couples Retreat make fun of it, too. So it's no wonder some people pick up the habit.
Constance Dunn is a communication specialist and author of the book Practical Glamour. She says the thin line between sexy and creepy is based on delivery and intent. Here are a few hilarious situations, according to Dunn, which make “Daddy” creepy:
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If the man is much older than you, it's creepy.
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If the man is someone who gives you financial support, it's creepy.
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If the man is called this by an adult woman who wears her hair in pigtails, it's creepy.
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If the man is called this by a woman who is a stripper, it's creepy.
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If the man is called this by an adult woman with even a hint of baby talk in her voice, it's creepy.
In Your Opinion
We threw this question up on the HeadDrama Facebook Page and we got some mixed reviews.
The real HeadDrama
All joking aside, many say there really is some legit HeadDrama behind the "Daddy" talk. Tina Tessina is a licensed psychotherapist and author of the book Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting about the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage. She says, sexual or not, it could actually be a sign of a relationship headed for trouble.
“In the parental case, relating to each other as ‘mommy’ and ‘daddy’ adds a barrier to having sex. It can mean the romance has gone out of the relationship and you're purely in parenting roles now. This is not good, because the couple connection is the foundation of a marriage and family. If that goes, the marriage and family are in jeopardy.
When there are not children involved, it does imply a father/daughter dynamic in an adult relationship. This can be problematic, too, in that it implies a power imbalance. The big ‘daddy’ has all the power; the ‘baby’ relinquishes hers. This may be fun for a while and sexy in a kinky sort of way, but it eventually loses its fun aspect and a power struggle can ensue. Sometimes, 'baby' grows up emotionally, and the whole relationship falls apart.”
So, what do you think? Is it sexy or creepy for a woman to call her guy “Daddy”? Do you do it? Guys, do you like it? Is it all in good fun or a sign of something more serious? Share your stories!
